Our 5th Anniversary

How do you celebrate your 5th wedding anniversary when most of your countrymen are mourning? How can you think straight when you’ve heard and read about families devastated? And how can you say life must go on to a Filipino who just lost one?

I fall to my knees and look up – to praise and honor, ask for forgiveness, give thanks that our families in Malabon were spared and beg for mercy with a whole nation. Then I need to stand again and do something... As Father Joe of Our Lady of Lourdes in Coffee Hall said in his homily two weeks ago, "When someone is sick, praying is really important but doing something to ‘actually help’ is another." I am humbled by all the Facebook messages coming even if they literally made me sick because of weariness. I still continued reading all Ondoy related shout outs and videos then found myself staring nowhere. Because I’ve got but a few in my Paypal… And when I hit the Red Cross online donation link, the transaction would not go through. I tried four times and choked laughing that maybe the amount I entered was too small. Or maybe I was just plain ignorant. Ha! Talk about feeling helpless. (I'm just relieved I have a husband who's in IT)!

I tried very hard to look on the brighter side.

It is also very hard to say something without being judged, talk about something that’s not your expertise, express empathy over something you have not experienced but I can’t shut it you know.

The brighter side I reckon is the Filipinos’ unyielding faith in God. I was proven yet again that He is all we shall ever need. I share to you, Psalm 23:4 as it was written - Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me...

I may not have experienced waiting to be rescued on the roof of my house, losing my family over drowning or getting mud off our ceiling and more but I would also always know and depend on God. Our little family has gone through many trials and obstacles for five years now, I wish not to compare the gravity of what we had and as a matter of fact, still having but clinging on my faith is fairly logical but losing it almost would be the scariest of all. Now, with a country who never forgot to say, “Patawarin niyo po kami Panginoon, Salamat po Panginoon, Tulungan ninyo po kami Panginoon”, I will always be reassured that indeed no matter what, everything is going to be okay.

So how shall I express gratuity of five years of being married to the man I always have dreamed about without being thick?

I quote, our first and dearest friends in Milton Keynes, the Escaños, particularly Ate Cech as she texted very early this morning: "Happy Anniversary Twinkie and Jose! May this day remind you the gift of lifetime partnership that our Great God blessed you with. May you continue to see your purpose as a couple and as a family.” Oh! I could have never said it better. Thank you very much. I have never been in so much peace my dear friends. As a couple, we may have had our share of love quarrels as bad as a typhoon but it is only these days that we truly included God in the middle of it all (shame but true) and what calm He really brings.

Jose and I have been thinking where, what, when and how are we to spend our 5th and if I was the same as I was four years ago, I could have died of tantrums. But no. I am just so grateful that I started the day hugging my one true love reminded that with him, we are very blessed in so many ways that I could not really ask for anything more.

Now to put a soft note on this anniversary entry, I would like to share a very heartwarming but cute exchange of what nots with Mia when I was saving some high school and college pictures that I’ve seen through Facebook and some other sites...

Me: Mia, let’s play a game! Can you find Mommy in the pictures that I’ll show?

Mia: Oh yes! Yes! Yes!

Me: The first one is this.

Mia: You’re uhm… the one in stripey yellow! So many of your friends like stripes too. Hihi!

Me: Haha! I know! We like stripes. Haha! What about this.

Mia: Mom! You’re the one in red and this is Ninang Twinkle! Why is her hair very short?

Me: So our friends will not get confused. :D And she really looks beautiful in short hair isn't it?Wow! You’re good in this! What about here.

Mia: You are the tallest girl! Mom, you have make up?

Me: Haha! Yes. Your Aunt Zara did it. Mommy does not know how to put on make up.

Mia: Where is Aunt Zara? Can she put make up on me too?

Me: I’ll show you later anak. Yes, maybe we can ask her on December? :D Now in this last photo, where am I?

Mia: You’re in grey!!! You are very pretty Mom.

Me: Really? What about her? (Pointing at Regine Velasquez).

Mia: She's pretty too but you are prettier!

Me: Haha! Love you anak! :D

Mia: I love you too Mom.

Me: Very good Mia. I’m really happy that you got it all right. Oh! Those were the days when Mom was still young and I was really slim isn’t it? Now… Mommy is...

Mia: Now, you are... my Dad’s wife! And we are a very happy family because we are all best friends! Yey!!!

And wouldn't I always want to be her Dad’s wife ei?

Hun, happy anniversary. Let's have the "chill" we always talk about later. Here’s to many many more to come!

Peace and God bless us all.